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When did you meet Maggie?
My first memory of Maggie is meeting in a restaurant on top of a hill overlooking the river running through Chattanooga, TN. The restaurant was glassed all around and we had an incredible view. Maggie and Dave had come down for a Sonship Week and I guess we had either come over from Ireland or down from Philly. The only thing I remember about the conversation is that Maggie talked about horses a lot. Having never ridden a horse (YES, I know that might be hard to believe and NO I don't want anyone to volunteer to "fix" this problem for me) and never really having any experience in that area whatsoever, I found the whole thing fascinating. She had on a very stylish red riding jacket and I think I probably had on my favorite Irish garb, my leather jacket. From that moment we did not really have any overlap in time but I knew that we were very different people.
How would you describe your differences?
Maggie is very precise and earnest. She seems very even in her temperament. She is very careful to do the kind thing. I have seen this on many occasions. We had lunch with several other women recently and she brought one of them flowers and me a little gift in a gift bag. So thoughtful ... it never really occurred to me to bring something to the lunch. I can see that our friendship will be forged out of substance and not just shared interests and similar personalities, because we are so different. I think we have the opportunity to reflect Christ as we get to know each other and learn to really love and appreciate the other. Hopefully, this will also be positive for the church. As we ‘dance around’ the place I see absolutely no worry we will step on one another's toes. Maggie seems more of a gliding ballroom dancer while I tend to be over on the side rearranging the play list.
How would you describe yourself?
My life is all about the internal. My brain is always going a mile a minute and I have a list a mile long of all of the things I want to get around to but can't seem to manage. I have piles of stuff in my life - projects started but not completed. I have way too many cookbooks and am known for never making the same thing twice. Josiah is often saying, ‘Honey, you need to write this one down so you won't forget how you made it.’ I say what's the fun in that? I could redecorate my house yearly because I am constantly changing my taste. I do not have a favorite color. Just my favorite color today. Is it green, no pink, well I really like red, or is it black and white? You get the idea. I like buying cheap clothes because you aren't stuck with them forever. I LOVE driving the 1989 Plymouth van that the Jones gave us at the airport when we arrived from Dublin. The paint is peeling and I am thinking, ‘Hey, spray paint comes in lots of colors.’ It gives me great freedom because I never worry about my car (I am not a big car person). Mud, dents, dicey parking places - no worries.
What are you into?
I am really into music and use my Mac to play albums at home through the stereo speakers. I believe my favorite ‘invention’ of the last few years is itunes. It's like being a kid in a candy store. You can buy random songs and listen to endless possibilities all from your living room chair. I love making different CD mixes. I am currently working on a mix for turning 50. As in years old! It begins with Cab Calloway singing ‘everybody eats when they come to my house’ and includes Dido, Fastball, The Ditty Bops, Coldplay, William Shatner, David Byrne, Spoon, Eyedea, The Zutons, They Might Be Giants, The Features, Scissor Sisters, Bonnie Raitt, Fred Astaire, The Blind Boys of Alabama and ends with the Beatles singing ‘Blackbird.’ I love jazz, blues and all sorts of random stuff. I have blown out the speakers of several of our stereos. Josiah is such a sweet guy he just keeps upping the wattage.
What would you say our your faults?
Josiah has really learned over the years to let me be myself even when it ends up being inconvenient and costly. I am passionate about my opinions, tend to state things way too strongly and generally have an amazing ability to put my foot in my mouth. I have a tendency to be a smart aleck at times when it is completely inappropriate. I am constantly vowing to do better. I can't spell worth a toot. I love to watch movies. It took me a lot of effort to train myself to drink diet soda.
How would you describe your marriage and family?
It is incredible to me this December Josiah and I will have been married 30 years. We are chalk and cheese (Irish-ism that means complete opposites) and yet I can't imagine my life without him. We make each other laugh every day and have learned to really appreciate our differences (mostly). I think we have brought out the best and the worst in each other over the years. I know that I would not be the person I am today if I had not married him. He is truly the greatest gift God has given to me even though there were times when I wanted to give him back. But not lately. The most amazing people in my life besides my sweetheart are my three children. They all have incredible hearts, are interesting, complicated and very talented. Yet, they are far from perfect - real people. I feel blessed to be their mom everyday. They are my favorite people with whom to go on vacation. I miss them every day!
Can you name some successes?
I guess my greatest accomplishment in life was to learn to raise my family, live and work in another culture. The costs were high; the rewards amazing. In some ways it feels like the years we had overseas completely altered my DNA. It definitely changed my spiritual DNA. God is much bigger, smarter, kinder, loving, faithful, interesting, and present in my life than He was before. I sometimes get a glimmer that I am appropriately diminishing. What a relief! Getting over myself has been one of the most exciting things about growing older as a Christian.
How do you feel about co-pastors?
I think it has great possibilities. The church gets the benefit of two very gifted men who fill in the gaps of the other. I think that working in team situations for so long has given Josiah and I a high value for a team dynamic in ministry. I believe Josiah and Dave's growing friendship and loving support of one another will be a powerful demonstration of the gospel that their sermons could never address. I think that the Holy Spirit fills and uses humble men. That these men have made a conscience decision to humble themselves gives me great hope to see what the Lord will do.
What is it like to be a ‘Pastor’s wife?’
It’s just what it is. Although I think Grace works very hard to overcome the fallout. Being a pastor's wife in the world of evangelical churches is often a cultural role. Say what you will, argue your enlightened point, it is still true. What is hard to deal with is the funky notion that it is not really happening. That there is no role. I am so thankful to be coming back into the pastor's wife situation with some age under my belt (figuratively and literally!), a solid sense of who I am, and a realistic idea of what I've gotten myself into. I think it is going to take me a while to get my footing here. I am struggling with culture shock, evangelical culture shock, and weariness of being unsettled in regards to our living situation. I miss so many people with whom I have forged deep relationships over the years. I think the possibility that Maggie and I can be a real help, encouragement and a safe place for each other is very hopeful and appealing.
How can the church best encourage you in that role?
I think that the best ways to encourage me as a pastor's wife is to let me be myself, trust that I am doing lots of stuff you can't see, never assume I know what you are talking about, keep telling me your name because I have probably forgotten it, and keep Josiah and I regularly in your prayers. I am thankful to be at Grace and embarking on this next adventure with Josiah. I look forward to the relationships that God will give me, the new areas of ministry in which he will lead, and as always seeing his faithfulness and mercies in new ways that I have never seen them before. I am at the place in my life where I constantly keep bumping up against my sin and sinful patterns which has made me more thankful each day that Jesus had mercy on me. And oddly enough, as I see those mercies extended to me each day I find myself more hopeful of the work of the Spirit in my heart as well as in the hearts of those around me than I have ever been.
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